


The Impossible Girl

by CallmeFred



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/M, Gen, Minor Character Death, Temporary Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-24
Updated: 2014-09-26
Packaged: 2018-02-10 07:17:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 12,297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2015979
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CallmeFred/pseuds/CallmeFred
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clara can't stop thinking about a photograph of a previous incarnation of the Doctor and a former pink and yellow companion, and thinking her whole life is a lie… AU</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Of Roses and Pinstriped Suits

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: This is a work of fanfiction, I don't own any of the characters from the Doctor Who universe, all credit goes to the BBC. I am not profiting anything from this story. A/N: There are certain scenes taken from episodes that I do not own.

"I'm not the only one to travel with you am I?" I asked the Doctor leaning back on the railing.

"No," said the Doctor flipping a switch.

"Then who else?" I asked.

"Many. I've had many companions," he replied.

"What happened to them?" I asked.

Regret crossed his face. "They got left behind, and some died. Or some chose to leave, or they forgot me," he hangs his head.

"I'm sorry," I expressed.

"It doesn't matter," his voice was barely audible.

I walk over to the console to stand beside him, "Would it help if you talked to me about them?"

"No," he muttered, cleaning off something on the console.

I put a hand on his shoulder comfortably, but he tries to get away. "Tell me." I said in a calm voice.

The Doctor sighs, "Fine. Come on." I follow him to the sitting room; there is a lit fireplace. Blue armchairs and sofas, the Doctor's favorite color must be blue, no wonder the TARDIS is blue. He walks over to a chest, and stares at it. I walk over to him.

"Is this where you keep memories?" I ask him, and he nods. "I'll help you open it," I offer.

He looks at me, his face is full of sadness and regret then he nods. He pulls a key out of his pocket and puts it in the keyhole. He turns it then puts a hand on the chest. I do the same and we open the chest. Many things are in it. Photographs, books, clothes, a TARDIS made from a milk carton, a milk carton?

"That's cool," I said aloud.

"What?" he said looking up.

I pick the TARDIS milk carton up, "This."

Loss fills his eyes, and then quickly turns away, "One of my companions made that. When she was little." He started rummaging.

"Little? You had a child companion?"

"No. I crashed in her garden when she was seven and came back twelve years later," hurt was heard perfectly in his voice.

Probably shouldn't push the subject anymore, I thought as I put the TARDIS back in the chest.

I pull out a shirt and the Doctor grunts and turns away. The shirt is a light blue with some purple. It has snap up buttons. Something about it seems familiar, like something Mum would wear. But Mum would never wear this! I smell it, such a familiar smell. Mum's smell; the smell of roses. I pull it away from my face, but Mum doesn't smell like that. She smells like cinnamon! What's wrong with me?

I go to put it back in the chest when I see a photograph. A brown haired man and a blonde woman wearing that same shirt, I pick up the photo. The man's hair is sticking up; he's tall and gangly wearing a blue pinstriped suit. I know that suit, but how? The woman has a big smile on her face, and has chocolate brown eyes. The same as mine but… I look up and walk over to a nearby mirror. The woman's face is the same as mine, and the man's hair is the same color as my hair. I look down at the photo and gasp. Everything around me zones out, nothing matters anymore. Two words are the only thing that matter. Mum. Dad.

"Clara?" said the Doctor jerking me to reality. I look up at him. "Are you all right?" he asks worried.

"Fine," I lied quickly.

He didn't look convinced but he didn't push the matter, "Do you want to go make a soufflé?" He seems to want to lighten me up.

"Yeah," I say cheerfully.

"All right then," he said rubbing his hands together smiling. "I've never made a soufflé before. Should be fun," he added.

I smile, and his eyes move to look at the photo in my hand. His smile fades as he stares at the blonde woman.

"Rose," he mutters.

"Rose?"

 _"I had shut the door then reopened it. I asked your mother what her name was and so she responded with 'Rose' and I 'the Doctor' and that was the start of a beautiful long-lasting friendship."_  The voice echoed in my head. It was my father, but it wasn't. It couldn't be; it was the man from the picture, but how do I know that?

"Hmm?" he looks up. "That's Rose," he said jabbing the picture where Mum was smiling. "That's me," he added at the pinstriped suited man.

_I walk in the kitchen and find Dad getting something out of the fridge._

_"Dad?" I asked._

_"Yes, sweetheart?" he responded taking the chocolate cake out of the fridge._

_"Why do you call yourself 'the Doctor' within family, and 'John Tyler' outside of the house? Why not, 'the Doctor'?" I asked curiously._

_He shuts the door with his leg, and he sets the cake on the counter, "Because Clara, if I went by 'the Doctor' in public then people would start asking questions."_

_"But haven't they already?" I asked._

_"Those didn't really happen to me," he said flatly turning away._

_"Of course they did!" I argued. "You're the Doctor!"_

_"No," he turns to look at me, "That happened to the other one, the real one," he emphasized on 'real'._

_"You're both real," I said bluntly, but he wasn't listening only turning back to his cake. "Never believe you aren't really the Doctor, Dad. Because you are."_

"Come on," the Doctor said patting my shoulder, which brought me back to reality. I put the picture back in the chest, and locked it. I follow him to the kitchens, my mind still on the photograph.

 


	2. Fish Custard

The Doctor opens the cupboards getting a bowl and setting it on the counter. Smiling, he asks, “What do we do first?” 

I sigh and show him; meanwhile my thoughts turn back to dad.

_Dad picked up the cake, the last piece of cake, and put it up to his mouth._

_“You’re planning to share that aren’t you?” I asked raising an eyebrow._

_“Huh?” he said turning to me, the cake still a half an inch away from his mouth, “Not really,” he took a large bite._

_“I want some!” I exclaimed. He winked and took a large bite. “DAD!” I shouted; mum came running in the room._

_“What’s happened?” she noticed dad eating the cake. “Doctor, that was for Amy!”_

_He freezes, the piece was halfway to his mouth, and then put it down back on the plate. “She can have the rest.”_

_“Time Lord germs? I doubt it,” I commented._

_“So what?!” he argued._

_“Amy wouldn’t like that,” I told him._

_“Never mind about that. I’ll make a whole cake for her!” he exclaimed turning to the cabinets._

_“You’re joking right, Doctor?” asked mum._

_“Nope!”_  

A loud crash brought me back to reality. The Doctor was on the ground with cracked raw eggs all over him.

 I sigh, “You _can't_ cook.”

 _“You_ can’t _cook,” mum shakes her head._

 “Sure I can!” he protested. “Learned in Paris in the eighteenth century!”

 _“Sure I can!” said dad. “Learned in Paris in the eighteenth century!”_  

What was I thinking? Dad couldn’t even bake that cake for Amy, how is the Doctor supposed to make a soufflé?

“Clean up, and come back here. We’re going to make something easier.” I instructed the Time Lord covered in eggs. 

“Eggs, flour, and milk, that’s all we need,” he said standing up.

 “Bit more than that,” I added with a smile coming onto my face. 

“Oh, be that way,” he said leaving the room. 

I smile leaning on the counter, and my thoughts returned to the failed chocolate cake. 

_Mum, dad and I are having a fun time making the cake. It started bad from the very beginning but who cares? The doorbell rings and I run to get it. Gran and gramps are at the door, I grin, but their faces are completely the opposite._

_“What happened to your clothes, Clara?” asked gran._

_I look down at my dress they’re drenched in chocolate batter. I look back up, “Well, we tried to make chocolate cake,” we laugh and I let them in._  

“Clara?” said a voice jerking me back to reality.

“Huh?” I said seeing the Doctor in front of me. 

“Are you all right? You’ve been zoned out the last fifteen minutes,” he asked worriedly.

 “Fine,” I lied. 

“Are you sure?” he asked. 

“Yes. Now let’s see...” I open the refrigerator; boxes of fish fingers and custard are practically the only things in the fridge along with an orange juice carton that turns out to be empty. “Why do you have an empty orange juice carton in here?”

 “Oh, must’ve forgot to throw it out.”

I take the orange juice carton out then close it, while smashing the carton, I ask, “Why is there nothing but fish fingers and custard in the fridge?” 

“Don’t know. It must be the TARDIS throwing random food in the fridge,” that’s what he told me but I don’t believe a word of it. He likes it, fish in custard. But something happened, a friend of his… maybe he ate it with them, and now it hurts to think about it because he lost them. 

 _“Pond,”_ my voice echoed in my head. But when did I say that? Like that?

 A memory came to my mind of me circling the TARDIS and dirt was all over her. Then another, the Doctor and I were on a cloud beside the TARDIS. 

_“Do you actually live up here on a cloud, in a box?” I asked._

_“I have done for a long time now,” the Doctor replied._

_“Blimey, you know how to sulk, don’t you?”_

_“I’m not sulking,” he protested._

_“You live in a box!”_

Where did that come from? The Doctor and I have never been on a cloud… you can’t even _stand_ on a cloud you’d fall right through! He was in Victorian clothing… but different then when we went to Sweetville. Wait… there was a picture of me in Victorian London, but I was never _in_ Victorian London. Pond, could anyone have the last name of Pond? It’s possible I suppose.

 _"Before that. I met you in the Dalek Asylum. There was a girl in a shipwreck and she died saving my life, and she was you,”_ the Doctor’s voice echoed in my head.

 " _I am Oswin Oswald. I fought the Daleks and I am human! Remember me,”_ it was my voice but I never said that.

  _“Run!” I screamed at him as the Doctor ran from the room. “Run, you clever boy. And remember,” not more then five seconds later I feel like I’m burning but there’s no fire. I looked at the screen, everything was on fire, and then everything was gone._

_I was beside a lakeside now._

_“Victorian London. There was a governess who was really a barmaid, and we fought the Great Intelligence together. She died and it was my fault, and she was you,” the Doctor was scaring me now._

_I was lying on something soft, and I was dying. The Doctor was kneeling beside me, “We saved the world, Clara, you and me. We really, really did.”_

_“Are you going to go back to your cloud?” I manage to say._

_“No more cloud. Not now.” He responded._

_“Why not?”_

_“It rained.”_

_My eyes started to close, and I started to go. “Run. Run, you clever boy. And remember,” my eyes shut and everything turned to black._  

I gasp, backing into something hard. 

“Clara?”

"Where did those come from?” 

“What did?” the Doctor asked. 

 _“What are you, eh? Are you a trick, a trap?” he’s scaring me even more! I thought._ I try backing away from the Doctor standing in front of me. 

“I don’t remember any of that before now. None. What do you mean I’m a trick?” I said warily. 

The Doctor stares at me with his mouth a gap, “You shouldn’t remember that!” 

“But I am! I died, twice. But how do I know that? The Asylum, Victorian London…” I trailed off. “I’ve never had those memories!” I exclaimed. 

“Clara? Are you alright?” he reaches out to touch me but I back away. 

“Get away from me!” he stops, and I continued talking, “You didn’t answer. “What did you mean I’m a trick? Or a trap? What were you talking about?” 

“It’s probably just from a dream you had, Clara,” he tries to deny it, but his eyes plainly say that he's lying. 

 _There's a man called the Doctor. He lives on a cloud in the sky, and all he does, all day every day, is to stop all the children in the world ever having bad dreams,” I telling a story to two children._  

“Just wake up, Clara. It’s a dream, it’s all a dream.” My head hurts, it hurts so much. It’s aching. Where did all these memories come from? It’s like they’re from different lives but I’ve never lived any more than the one I’m living now. The Doctor is suddenly divided into four, my eyes roll into my head, and everything is gone. 

I wake up on something soft. I open my eyes and see a ceiling. Having no idea what just happened I sit up, and see bookshelves and my laptop sitting on my desk. I’m at the Maitland’s, that’s for sure. I check my laptop for the date and time: 4:45PM, Wednesday, April 10, 2013. The Doctor should be coming sometime soon. I go downstairs, and find Artie and Angie sitting at the table doing what looks like their homework. I get all the ingredients for a soufflé and set them on the counter. I get a bowl out of the cupboard and set it on the counter. 

“Oh, no. You're going to try and make a soufflé again, aren't you?” groaned Angie. 

“My mum's soufflé, yeah. Although this time I'll get it right. This time I will be Soufflé Girl,” I started pouring the ingredients in. 

“How can it be your mum's soufflé if you're making it?” asked Artie. 

“Because, Artie, it's like my mum always said. The soufflé isn't the soufflé, the soufflé is the recipe.” 

“Was your mother deep on puddings?” wondered Angie. 

“She was a great woman,” I assured her stirring the batter. An envelope is sitting on the counter addressed to me. I pick it up and ask what it is. After Angie answers I go upstairs to read it. 

I open the letter and read: _“My dearest Clara. The Doctor entrusted me with your contact details in the event of an emergency, and I fear one has now arisen. Assuming this letter will have reached you as planned, on April the tenth, 2013, please find and light the enclosed candle. It will release a soporific which will induce a trance state, enabling direct communication across the years. However, as I realize you have no reason to trust this letter, I have taken the liberty of embedding the same soporific into the fabric of the paper you are now holding. Speak soon.”_  

I faint.


	3. The Exploding Wolf

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter, sorry! But it moves the story along.

_"I have to go in there," I said looking into the timestream. The Doctor begs me not to. "But this is what I've already done. You've already seen me do it. I'm the Impossible Girl, and this is why." I reminded him._

_"Whatever you're thinking of doing, don't," Professor Song warned._

_"If I step in there, what happens?" I asked her. Professor Song went on about how I would split into a million pieces. "But the echoes could save the Doctor, right?" I asked hopefully._

_"But they won't be you. The real you will die. They'll just be copies." She told me sadly._

_"But they'll be real enough to save him. It's like my mum said. The soufflé isn't the soufflé, the soufflé is the recipe. It's the only way to save him, isn't it? Well, how about that? I'm soufflé girl after all." I started walking up to the threads of light. "If this works, get out of here as fast as you can. And spare me a thought now and then. In fact, you know what?" I turn to face the Doctor. "Run. Run, you clever boy, and remember me." I raise my eyebrows and step into the threads._

* * *

 I don't where I am. I just know I'm running. Sometimes its like I've lived a thousand lives in a thousand places. I'm born, I live, I die. And always, there's the Doctor. Always I'm running to save the Doctor again and again and again. And he hardly ever hears me. But I've always been there. Right from the day he started running. I don't know where I am. I don't know where I'm going or where I've been. I was born to save the Doctor, but the Doctor is safe now. I'm the Impossible Girl, and my story is done. 

Memories flash in my head of the Doctor throughout his past; then I see his future. I fall into the Trenzalore graveyard. I'm lost. I'm scared. I call out for the Doctor, but I don’t hear my voice, though he responds from somewhere. Several incarnations of the Doctor pass me. A leaf, the same leaf that my father had got hit with comes flowing down. I catch it and my Doctor shows up. I stumble toward him and fall into his arms. Turning my head, I notice a man facing away. I ask the Doctor who he is and he responds saying that his real name wasn't the point, it was the name he chose: the Doctor. I fall in his arms, weak. He calls my name in a worried voice. He goes on about something, something that I don't really understand. I'm getting really dizzy so I fall in his arms; the Doctor doesn't even walk five steps when I fall unconscious and I explode. Flesh is everywhere, and he screams. Then I realize. It wasn't really me I was a doppelganger. That was a doppelganger of Clara Oswald, but her story is done, because it's awakened. The wolf inside of me, it's awakened. I remember now, I'm not Clara Oswald. I'm Clara Tyler and its time for her to reawaken. The Bad Wolf is my mother, and the wolf passed on into me. The wolf is exploding now. I feel it I can control everything. Everything that ever was, everything that ever will be and everything that ever could've been, or never can be. 

To make that happen, I have to go home, to my real home; back to Upper Leadworth to my half human father and my real living mother I make Clara Oswald at Trenzalore a doppelganger made from the Flesh. Without any warning, everything goes black. I gasp and my eyes open. I'm staring up at my outer space painted ceiling and that's when I realize it. I'm home.


	4. Home Sweet Home

I sit up and look around; my TARDIS (cupboard) is sitting in the corner, and my row of many colored converses beside it. On the other side of the room are my three bookshelves filled with books; I mean it literally, _full_ of books. Other books are stacked on top of each other places in my room too, like on top of the TARDIS, and my desk that my laptop sits on.

 “Home,” I muttered. “I’m home.” 

Remembering my parents, I rush to the door, and throw it open running downstairs. Gran, gramps, dad, mum, and Tony are in the kitchen. Mum is taking a teapot to the table, she notices me. Mum’s fingers slip from the teapot handle as her mouth falls to the floor. The teapot comes crashing down on the floor, and the tea spatters her clothes while the china falls broken. Everyone at the table look around, and see me standing in the middle of the dining room. 

“Clara?” said gran blinking in disbelief. “Is it you?”

“It’s me, Gran,” I put a smile on my face, she runs to hug me, and I hug her back.

 “I’ve missed you so much,” she said kissing me on the cheek. 

“Me too,” I confess even though I didn’t remember my Tyler life till not even five minutes ago.

 Gran lets go and my parents come running at me, dad picks me up and hugs me. Even though of my twenty-four years of age, no wait. I’m nineteen! “Clara. Clara,” he whispers, “Clara.”

 “Dad,” I whisper back a tear falling down my cheek. “I can’t believe it’s you.” 

“Me neither,” he whispered gently. 

“Hey, let me in,” said mum teasingly. I put my arm around her. It’s like when I was a child dad would hold me and I would hug both my parents.

 “I missed you both so much,” more tears were falling. 

“I was so so worried about you, Clara. Never do that again,” scolded mum even though there were tears in her eyes too. 

“I won’t, Mum.” 

We pull apart, smiles on all our faces. Suddenly, I fall down to the floor onto my feet. “Sorry,” apologized dad. “You’re heavy.” Everyone in the room laughs. Then a ring goes off. The phone goes red and a voice speaks:

  _“Hey. Just checking in. I know this is getting annoying but… is Clara back?”_

 “Melody!” I exclaimed running to the phone. Running to the phone, picking it up, and putting it to my ear. I scream as loud as I possible could, “Yes!”

   _“Woah! Clara! Mind my ears will you?”_ my best friend at the other end.

 “Sorry.” I apologized. “Why are you calling anyways, I live next door. Get over here!”

 _“I’m coming!”_ Melody said. _“Mum I’m going next door!”_ I hear Melody say away from the phone.

  _“If Clara’s back then I’m coming over too,”_ protested Amy.

  _“Mum!”_

 _"Rory!”_ Amy called.

I laugh, and say, “See you in a bit,”

 _“Yeah, see you,”_ I smile and hang up, then I turn to my family, “The Williams’ are coming over,”

 “They haven’t been over for a long time,” said mum sarcastically.

“Only twelve hours ago!” dad commented. I grin, that sounds like them. 

Suddenly a door opens and bright red hair comes flying at me. The next thing I know I’m being pulled into a tight hug. 

“Clara! Clara! I missed you! Don’t do that ever again!” 

“Too tight,” I choked. 

She lets go, “Sorry,” She looks at me, “But what happened?” 

Everyone is looking at me now, “Long story,” I said truthfully. 

“I’ll put on a pot of tea and we can sit down in the Family Room, how’s that Clara?” suggested Mum. 

I look at her, smiling and I nod. Mum goes into the kitchen and the rest of us cram on the couches in the family room. Everyone starts chatting, so I just sit here listening unsure what to say. I look around the room. There are ten red haired people in the whole room: One, Amy. Two, Melody. Three, is that Vincent? He’s sitting there talking to dad; he’s tall and quite handsome. I smile, heat rises to my cheeks. I stop myself, what am I doing? I’m three years older then him, and I love Alfie! 

“Alfie,” I murmered. What if he loves someone else? I told him no that day after Wolfie… oh gosh. No. I stand and run out of the room. 

 “Clara is everything all right?” I hear mum say vaguely, but I don’t stop. 

I throw the front door open and run out. The door slams behind me and I run next door. The green door I know so well. I put my hand in a fist, and raise it to knock. I do, four times. My heart is racing, I can’t even think. What if Alfie answers the door? What if his girlfriend answers? What if he hates me? The door opens, and Alfie is standing there. Tall, messed up brown hair, and dimples on his cheeks. He is more handsome then ever before. He stares in shock, his eyes wide. 

“C-Clara?” he says bewildered.


	5. Three Years

“A-alfie,” saying his childhood name that hasn’t been said in so long. 

“But, but you’ve been gone,” he pointed out. “Three years!” he exclaimed. 

“I know. But I’m back now,” I put a smile on my face, an awkward smile. My stomach is full of butterflies now. 

“Where’ve you been?” he asked. 

“Long story,” I said shyly, heat was rising to my cheeks. I put my head down hiding my face with my hair. 

“Then tell it.” 

I look up, “Long story short. I created another life and put myself in it. Twenty-four years worth.” 

“Twenty-four?” he said flabbergasted. 

“Yeah. I have a big imagination.” I admitted adding a smile at the end.

Alfie chuckles, “You really do. That’s what I love about you.” Every bone in my body feels as if it’s been frozen, I stare, eyes wide, my mouth a gap.  Alfie steps out of the door towards me. “Yes, Clara. I still love you, I never gave up on you,” his touch made me jerk back to life. 

“Truly?” I whisper. 

“Truly,” he puts a smile on his face and I smile back. I pull him in for a hug.

Oh, I missed you,” he confessed. 

“Me too,” there’s a long silence between him and I even though there are distant voices in my head are talking, they always are, don’t worry about it. I shake my head like usual and looking down, I confessed, “I thought you would have someone else.” 

“No, Clara. I’ve liked you since I was twelve,” admitting his secret.

My head jerks up in shock, “Me too.”

“I don’t believe it,” Alfie looked astonished.

 I smile, “We were meant to be,” I pause. “Now why don’t you get your parents and head over to my house? We can have a party,” I added smiling.

He grins, “Yeah! See you later!” he goes in the house, “Mum! Dad! Clara’s back!” 

I grin and run back home. I open the front door, and walk in. The door shuts behind me. I walk in the family room finding everyone chatting and drinking tea. 

“Clara!” exclaimed Amy.

“Where’ve you been?” asked Melody.

“You don’t go running off, honey,” scolded mum.

“Sorry,” I apologized. “I had to see Alfie.” A big ‘ohh’ goes around the room. Everyone knows I love him; none of it’s a secret. “The Owens’ are coming over,” I sit down. “We’re having a party!” 

“Party!” exclaimed a little Williams’ jumping up and down. Her curls bounce, her smile is wide and happy. I don’t recognize her. Amy must’ve had her while I was gone. 

I smile at her, “I don’t believe we’ve met yet.”

 She shakes her head that makes her curls bounce again. Then she bounds on my lap, “I’m Rosie!” she introduced. 

“Clara,” I introduce even though she knows already. 

“I know,” she says still smiling. 

“Of course you do,” she’s still smiling when she jumps off my lap. Does that girl ever stop smiling? A ring goes through the house, and mum goes to answer it. She comes back with the Owens’, Craig and Sophie notice me, it puts large smiles on their faces.

 “Clara!” exclaimed Sophie. 

“Hello Sophie!” I greet standing up to hug her, Craig is the next hugging me. 

“I’ve missed you! Everyone did!” he remarked. 

“Party in the backyard everyone! Allons-y!” Amy shouts, and we all join in. We all head out the back door to the unprepared party, but everyone goes straight to work. 

It’s quite a different party. Rosie, Craig and Susan all helped make a poster saying ‘Welcome Back Clara!’ within two minutes. Mum got leftovers store bought and homemade snacks out and tablecloths on the table. Amy called her Raggedy Doctor, and he provided ‘chicken mustard’. 

“Would you like some?” asked a voice, I notice a man in a tweed jacket wearing a bowtie is standing in front of me holding out a chicken nugget that’s been dipped in mustard. 

Suddenly, I’m somewhere else; Amy’s Raggedy Doctor is kneeling a few feet away but is dressed in a purple suit. “Clara! Please Clara!” his voice was full of regret. He’s kneeling on the ground clutching his head in his hands. I stare at him; I’m invisible to him. How could I forget you Doctor? I was so caught up in my family and friends I forgot you. I tried to speak but it didn’t come out. 

“Clara?” he must’ve heard me somehow because he is looking up straight at me.

 “Doctor?” I said aloud. 

“Clara please,” he was practically begging now, “Clara! Clara! Come back!” it was the Doctor’s voice but the one in front of me but his mouth wasn’t moving. “Clara, what happened?” It was the same voice but the Doctor in front of me wasn’t saying anything.

 I was breathing hard, “I left him. How could I leave him?”

“Leave who?” he wondered. 

“What?” I looked up. A brown tweed jacket Doctor is standing in front of me now, his hands on my shoulders.

 “Are you okay?”

 “Fine, I’m fine,” I lied.

 “No, you’re not. What _happened_?” he forced the last word at me. 

“I left the Doctor.” 

“I’m-“

“No,” I said interrupting him, “Another Doctor. An alternate one. I left him stuck in his own time stream!” 

“Sorry, what?” He asked puzzled. 

“I created another life with a different name,” I looked down at the ground. 

“How though? You can’t just disappear like you did.”

"The Bad Wolf,” I said. “It was the Bad Wolf.”

“Rose told me about that,” he said sounding worried.

I keep forgetting this Doctor didn’t have Rose he had Kathleen; lovely woman he says, I wish I knew her. “I made myself Clara Oswald,” I continued, “I lived in Lancashire, England with my parents. My mother had died when I was fourteen. I was a nanny for the Maitland family after I went to university, and that’s when I met him. The Doctor.”

“Me. In a parallel universe,” he said grinning widely.

 “Yep. He still wore bowties though,” I added sadly. 

“Bowties are cool!” he protested fixing his own.

“Clara!” I heard Dad say. I turn and see mum and dad walking toward me. 

“What’s up?” I asked.

Dad holds out a letter, “The universe is in trouble, and the Doctor is in the mist of it. The one I came from.” 

I must’ve sent a letter while in his time stream but I just don’t remember or it was Madame Vastra. “What kind of trouble?” I ask worried.

“The Time War. It’s been unlocked…” he said breathing hard. 

It what? “What?” I said learning forward. 

Dad nods, “He couldn’t have said his name, that’s the only way the lock unlocks!” dad was breathing hard now. 

I take the letter and read it: 

_Dear Doctor & Rose Tyler_

_The Doctor needs your help. He’s in trouble, he’s been to Trenzalore and now the Time War has been unlocked. If you go to Lancashire, he’ll run into you there. He knows nothing of this. He’ll land at 18 ­­­­Kent Street on November 23, 2013 at 3pm. The address is in your home universe. Please your help is needed._

_Please come quickly._

-       _Bad Wolf”_  

“Bad Wolf,” I heard mum say. 

I swallow, that was my home address, or Clara Oswald’s, that’s where she grew up, “How do we get there?” 

“I don’t know,” said mum. 

Suddenly, I’m burning. I hold my hands out, “Take a hand.” 

Mum and dad look at me terrified, “Clara?” 

“I can take us there. Just take a hand.” 

“Clara-“ mum started. 

“Come on!” I encouraged. 

They each take one, and suddenly we’re flying through red and blue then into nothing.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all have enjoyed this story, and yes, there is an introduction of the alternate Doctor, (yes, there is a Doc in Pete's World), which he may be in later chapters (shh, spoilers! ;) ). Yes, I have found the chicken mustard just as digusting as you may have, but it's all I could think of. I love feedback, so please consider it.
> 
> Until next Thursday!


	6. Imagination

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Sorry for the late update, I've been busy. There are some spoilers to the classic series, and references.

I’m sending a letter to my parents as the Bad Wolf. We fall onto something hard. I groan, rubbing my head I open my eyes. In front of me is the house I know so well. 

“Clara?” came mum’s voice, “are you okay?”

 “Fine, Mum,” I tell her. 

“Is it the right place?” mum asked. 

“Yeah,” I assured her. 

She turns to me, “How can you be sure?” 

“Because this is where I lived. As Clara Oswald,” I told her. Dad is staring at me now. 

“I’ll find her! I promise!” said a voice I heard only minutes before. 

“She exploded into goo! That’s what you said!” Dave Oswald exclaimed. 

“It’s complicated. That was a copy, the real Clara,” he stopped, staring right at me. “Clara?” 

“How’d you get out?” I put my hands on my hips, now standing. He’s standing right there; the Doctor, alive and fine. The last time I saw him he was mourning over Clara Oswald’s exploded body. 

“It’s a long story,” he said. 

“Tell me!” I demanded. 

“Later," he said turning to Dave. “See, Dave? Clara’s fine!” 

“Clara, honey,” he put his arms out.

 I stare at him; he used to be the man I would run into his arms whenever I saw him but not anymore. He is just another man in the universe now. 

“Clara,” he repeated, wanting me to run and hug him. 

“Hey,” I greeted. 

“Clara, honey. What’s wrong? You always run into my arms!” 

“I have to tell you a story,” I said flatly. Because of my words his smile falters, “Let’s go inside.” 

I start to walk to the door; Dave puts his arm around me, “What happened, Clara? Why are you acting like this?” 

I don’t say anything, and we walk inside being followed by Mum and Dad, and the Doctor. We sit in the sitting room; Dave looks at me wanting to know the truth. I start to tell him: 

“These are my real parents, John and Rose Tyler,” John came off rough on my tongue, that wasn’t his name. I indicate my hand to my parents, “I was born to them in a little village in England in a alternate universe. I grew up loving books; my best friends lived next door. I got a pet wolf when I was two his name was Wolfie. And well when I was seventeen, Wolfie died. I loved him, I absolutely adored him,” tears come down my cheeks. “He was my best friend, and he was gone. I nearly had a boyfriend too, but I couldn’t do it. I turned him down even though I loved him. After that, I barely ate or talked. I tried to get over it but nothing helped. Not even reading or daydreaming. He was so close to me. I started making up another life in my head. My name was Clara Ellie Oswald, I loved traveling, loved soufflés, loved to read. And one day, it got out of hand and I disappeared sucked into that life. And that’s how I got here. I’m sorry, Dad. But I created you.” Tears are falling down, and I don’t even care. Dave just stares at me, mouth a gap.

 “And Ellie? You created Ellie? This whole life with your huge imagination of yours?” I nod. “Oh, Clara. Can I have a hug at the very least?” he stands, holding out his arms. 

I nod crying, and I run into his arms, “I’m sorry, I really am. I didn’t know.” I said through my tears, “It took over me.” 

“Don’t apologize Clara,” he told me stroking my hair, “‘don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened’,” he quoted; a large smile comes onto my face.

  _Dr. Seuss,_ I thought. 

“You were a great dad,” I acknowledged. 

He smiles, “And you were a great daughter.”

“Thanks for everything, and ‘mum’,” I assured him. 

“Same to you, Clara Ellie Oswald,” smiles come on our faces.

I turn to my real parents, “I’m ready to go home.” 

“Really? Do you _have_ to? Just when the whole universe is in danger?” complained the Doctor.

 “You’re joking right?” asked dad. 

“Like always,” commented mum.

 “What happened?” I sighed. 

“The Time War has been unlocked,” he said.

 “What?!” exclaimed Dad 

“Unlocked?” asked Mum.

 “How was it locked?” I asked. 

 _A timelock triggered by the Doctor’s name_ , a voice inside me answered. 

Dad and the Doctor exchange looks, before the Doctor turns to me and mum, “Let’s get in the TARDIS, and we’ll tell you.” We say bye to Dave, and leave the house. We clamber inside the Doctor’s TARDIS; it’s the same blue TARDIS with not much light. 

“There’s something called a timelock…” started the Doctor, and he continued on, I hardly listened. I knew it all. 

“So you locked the Time War with your name and someone has now said it and has released the _whole_ war?” queried Mum.

“Yeah.”

 “Who said it?” I asked.

 “You met her. At Trenzalore. Professor Song.” 

I heard dad shuffle his feet, but I was confused, “When? I don’t remember.” I rack my brain to figure out when it happened. 

“You were too busy trying to not get your heart getting stopped to hear,” he explained. 

“What?!” exclaimed mum and dad.

 “Oh then? When your tomb opened?”

 “Yeah. That’s right,” he replied completely ignoring my parents’ concern about my heart getting stopped. There’s complete silence between the four of us. I shuffle my feet waiting for someone to say something besides the voices in my head. 

“So, how do we lock it again?” wondered mum breaking the four-minute silence. 

“The only way is to go to Gallifrey,” the Doctor said bluntly. 

More silence. 

“Can we?” I wonder. 

“I should be able to, the big problem is trying not to get hit by a Dalek or something. I’ll be walking in the middle of a battlefield.” 

“I?” said mum folding her arms. “You complained about us going home earlier, and you say ‘I’?” 

“Right sorry,” he flapped his arms around like usual. “You lot can get home, I’ll save the universe,” the Doctor said stubbornly. 

“You can’t do it alone,” dad spoke up. 

“Course I can, I’ve done it once before,” 

“You were already _on_ Gallifrey!” dad’s temper was rising. 

“I know I was!” the Doctor walks up to him. “I can do it, even if it kills me,” he added.

"You can’t die,” I said breaking into their argument.

“The universe is better without me; I only ruin things, I lead people to their deaths,” he claimed but I knew that he really believed it.

Tears spring to my eyes, making my vision blurry, “You don’t really believe that do you, Doctor?” I asked. 

“It’s true, Clara! Do you know how many people have died because of me?” his anger rose. I shake my head in fear of my best friend standing in front of me. He started naming people that have died, but I’m not listening. Tears are falling down my face, and mum spoke up, “How Doctor? How could those been your fault? How many chose?” 

He looks in the distance, thinking, then he spoke, “Ten,” his voice was hoarse. “Ten chose.” 

“Ten out of fourteen were their own choices to die, Doctor. You never caused them to do anything. What were the other three choices?” 

“Donna didn’t want to forget me,” he paused. “Clara in Victorian London didn’t want to go either, and neither did Peri.” 

“Which one of those did you cause?” queried mum. 

“Donna’s, I killed her,” he said guilty. 

“You didn’t kill her, she’s still out there, alive,” she assured him. 

“Not being able to remember the precious times we had together!” he shouted. 

“But she isn’t dead, so that’s down to three. Did you cause Clara’s, Peri’s, or Adelaide?” 

He nods, “Just Adelaide’s, I changed a fixed point in time, and made her kill herself when she got back to Earth,” he still looks guilty. 

“Just one, Doctor, just one,” mum assured him. 

He sighed, “I sent River to her death. I could’ve stopped it,” he grumbled. 

I roll my eyes, and notice dad; he looks jealous and guilty at the same time. Dismissing it, “There’s nothing you can do, Doctor. Stop complaining, and do something!” 

“Fine, fine,” he said flipping a control. “But I’m going alone.” 

“No, you’re not!” I exclaimed. 

“Clara, I can’t lose you again. Not for a fourth time, I can’t!” 

“Those other three weren’t me!” I protested. “I can’t see you die either.” 

“Clara, no,” he told me bluntly. 

“You’re not going, Clara,” said dad. 

“Neither are you!” the Doctor complained. 

“If you go alone, it’ll be worse than if we came along,” mum spoke up. 

The Doctor stares at her, “Rose, no. I’m not going to lose you again.” 

“We have to lock the war, Doctor. The universe is in getting in more and more danger every second!” warned dad. 

“You can come, but not Rose or Clara.” 

“Excuse me?” I said while mum just stares at him. 

“The universe is in danger! You two are not coming, is that clear?” he looks at us, standing over us. 

I want to protest, but he’s already lost his temper, and I don’t want to see what would happen if I did. “Yes,” I said. 

“Good. Now just hang out upstairs or something. But stay here!” mum and I go through the door to the halls. 

“I’ve never seen him lose his temper like that before,” commented mum. 

“Same here. But I have a plan.” 

Mum stops, “Clara. You’re not coming.” 

“Mum-“ I complained. 

“That’s that. I’m sneaking out after them while you stay here,” she curtly. I stare at her, in all my years mum has never talked to me like that before. 

“Yes, ma’am,” I lied through my teeth. Mum grabs my hand and takes me to my room. 

After she leaves, I wait until she’s gone to sneak out but when I go to the door is locked. 

 _Stupid TARDIS_ , I thought. The TARDIS shakes knocking a couple books off the shelves. _I probably shouldn’t of thought that. The TARDIS can hear me._ The TARDIS noise fills the room, and I fall onto my bed not being able to do anything. 

 _Is there anything I can do? TARDIS, please open the door_. I stand and walk over to the door, jiggling the knob nothing happens. “Come on!” I exclaimed. 

 _“You can do it,”_ a voice inside me tells me. My eyes feel like they’re burning, then I hear as if a key is unlocking the door, I grab the knob and turn it. It worked! I sneak out of the room and the door closes behind me. I walk down to the console room, but it’s empty. I pull the scanner towards me. The Time Lord part of me recognizes it as Gallifrey, there are people everywhere hiding and being killed. Daleks are everywhere shooting everything in sight. The sky is burning. I stand, frozen. I don’t want to go out there, but they’re out there! The Doctor, mum, and dad, they’ll die! Tears come to my eyes; I’m not brave enough to go out there. My knees collapse at the sight of the falling bodies, and the burning sky. 

 _“Courage isn't a matter of not being frightened, you know. It's being afraid and doing what you have to do anyway,”_ dad’s words ring in my head. 

 _They’ll die without me._ I move my head toward the doors, but I don’t want to go out there! I stand, turning off the scanner I start pushing buttons and flipping levers like I’d been doing it for years. It felt natural to me. The TARDIS takes off, and lands somewhere. I look at the scanner; it’s a empty battlefield. I head toward the doors, still terrified. I unlock the lock, and open the door and walk out. There are no bodies, surprisingly. 

“Come on, Leela!” shouted a voice. My head turns toward the voice, a dark figure of a woman is shouting at a woman fifty feet behind her. 

“You go on!” the woman, Leela yelled at the other woman. 

“I’m not leaving you!” she admitted. 

“I’d rather die in battle than run away, Romana. You know me.” Leela starts to turn away. 

“Leela, please!” she begged. 

“Goodbye, Romana!” she turns away. 

 _“Exterminate!”_ shouts a robotic voice and Leela is shot, she falls to the ground. It happened all so fast and I just watched in terror and shock. 

“Leela!” Romana’s screams fill the air, “No!!” 

Suddenly, I feel her pain and I double over. It hurts; she was so close to her. I look up, my eyes burning and the Dalek that killed her turns to dust. She runs to Leela’s body, and I stand running to her. I put my arm around her; she makes a move, trying to struggle out of my arm. 

“It’s okay,” she stopped; there’s silence as she looks at me. Her eyes are full of tears. There are old and fresh scratches all over her face, and her hair is dirty. “I’m sorry for your loss,” I tell her. 

“Was that you?” she managed. “Did you make the Dalek turn to dust?” I nod in reply. “How?” 

“A power inherited from my mother,” I explained. I don’t even know this woman! Why am I telling her this? “She’s human but she looked into the heart of a TARDIS, and it passed into me.” 

“Amazing,” she choked. I put my arm around her, and let her cry into my shoulder.


	7. The Last Great Time War

After Romana finished crying, she sighed wiping her tears. “She should be taken back to her family, but I don’t know how we’d get there.” 

“The TARDIS,” I said. 

She looks up at me, “You have a TARDIS?” 

“She’s not mine. She’s a friend’s,” I explained. 

Romana nods, “Would your friend take her home?” 

I look down at Leela’s body, “Yes. I’m sure he would.” 

“What’s your name, by the way?” Romana asked.

 I look at her. “Clara. Yours?”

 “Romanadvoratrelundar,” I stare at her shocked. “But you can call me Romana.”

 “Okay, Romana.” I added, we laugh, the laugh on Romana’s face seems wrong on her war torn face. “Let’s take her to the TARDIS.” I stand up, and lean over to pick up Leela. Romana protests, but I tell her she is much too weak. I walk toward the TARDIS, with Romana at my tail. We come to a stop at the TARDIS. 

“It’s a police box,” Romana remarked. 

“Yeah. But…” 

“What?” she asked turning her head to me. 

“I don’t have a key. He never gave me one.” 

 _“What are you saying, child? Your mother looked into my heart, you can easily open me without all that.”_ A voice spoke in my head. _Of course_ , I thought. I look at the keyhole, and imagine a key turning. The doors swing open, and I grin. I continue on, Leela in my arms, I walk into the TARDIS. Staggering, my eyes feel as if they’re burning. I set Leela down, I think, I’m not sure. 

 _She’s fine._ A voice assures me. And suddenly, I see it all. I feel it all. Everything that’s happened, everything that hasn’t, everything that can’t. 

“Come on! Run!” exclaimed the Doctor’s voice. “We have ninety seconds!” 

“Rose, get in!” dad’s voice yelled. 

“I’m getting in, Doctor!” came mum’s voice. The doors shut, and the TARDIS noise fills the air. 

“Doctor?” I managed. 

“Clara?” I heard, “Clara!” I hear footsteps running towards me. 

“I don’t know where I am,” I said. 

“Clara,” he repeated beside me now. 

“Help me,” I reach out, hoping to grab something; I grab his suit. “I don’t know where I am. I can see it all. The whole of time and space.” 

“Doctor, is it the Bad Wolf? You said it wouldn’t go into her! You said it was gone from me!” mum was so close but sounded so far away at the same time. 

“I don’t know, Rose. I don’t know,” dad’s voice was frantic. 

“Stay here, Clara. Please,” the Doctor begged. 

“I can bring life.” 

“Clara!” exclaimed Romana and the Doctor quickly. I hear a gasp then coughing, was that Leela? I can’t stop this! 

“Romana? Leela?” I hear.

The voices are getting more and more distant. I can’t hear anything; I don’t know where I am! I feel my mouth move saying that but I’m lost. Lost in time, I’m exploding in the whole of time and space. 

Only one thought going through my mind: I don’t know where I am! Then one help! Suddenly it stops, and everything is gone. My thoughts slowly slip into nothing I suppose this is death… 

I gasp, and suddenly I’m facing a wall. My TARDIS bedroom, I’m breathing heavily. I must’ve fainted in the console room for some reason, I don’t even remember why but I had a terrible nightmare! I don’t even remember what it was about.

I push my bed sheets off, and stand up. I walk to the door, opening it I stagger out into the hall. It’s the TARDIS all right. But I’ve had the most terrible nightmare; the last thing I remember was two voices exclaiming “Clara!” The voices were still in my head, I knew one of them so well but then I didn’t. I know the other is the Doctor’s but what of the other?

I turn a corner, then another finding myself in the console room. The door opens, and I see the Doctor in his purple suit standing next to a blonde woman who’s laughing. Her tongue in her smile and it hits me. I know that laugh so well. But I’ve never seen her before in my whole life! Next to the woman is a man with spiked brown hair; his brown eyes are just like mine. He’s smiling too; he’s holding the blonde woman’s hand as if they’re a couple. I smile they look so natural together. 

“So, where are we headed, Doctor?” Asked the blonde. 

“No idea! Time War’s been locked. Universe’s been saved. Clara’s fine, hopefully,” he added, “Romana and Leela have come back. Leela hopefully isn’t immortal and-“ 

“What?!” exclaimed a voice. 

“I didn’t say anything,” he quickly said trying covering up what he said. 

“You did,” said the woman who must be “Leela” with her hands on her hips. 

Am I invisible? No one is noticing me. Not the couple beside the Doctor, not him, or even Leela. 

“Doctor?” said a new voice, but familiar; it was the voice from my dream. How many people were on the TARDIS? 

“Yes, Romana?” 

“Clara,” the Doctor, the couple, and Leela all turned around to look at me. 

“Clara. You alright?” 

“Fine,” I said. “Had a terrible nightmare though.” 

“What was it about?” he asked worried. 

“I don’t remember, but we were in here going somewhere.”

“We’re going somewhere right now.”

 “But it was just you and me. And what was that about a Time War?”

 “It’s nothing, Clara. It’s fine.”

“No, at Akhatan you told the God that you ‘walked away from the last Great Time War’.”

 “I didn’t say that,” he lied.

 “You did! Don’t lie! What happened, Doctor? We were here, and then I woke up in my bed. I had forgotten something, what was it?”

 “Your mind would burn if you ever remembered, Clara,” was all he said confirming that I did in fact forget something.

 “What did I do?” I asked not even caring.

 “Spoilers,” I punch his arm, “Ow! What was that for?”

 “Not telling me! What did I do?”

“Clara, I can’t say!” 

“Why not!” I punch his arm again. 

“She’s not like Donna, why would her mind burn?” said a new voice, new but so very familiar, like I’ve known him my whole life. My anger settled down hearing his voice. 

“I…” the Doctor trailed off looking at me, “Clara, you saved my life. We went to Trenzalore, my grave.” 

Suddenly all the memories came back.

“I remember,” I told everyone. The Doctor was getting worried but I was fine. “The milk carton TARDIS, the picture, fish custard, the Maitland’s, conference call, Trenzalore, I walked in a thread of strings, home sweet home, my parents, gran, gramps, the Williams’, Alfie… then I woke here,” the Doctor’s face softened at the last part. I turn to look at the couple beside the console, and I know now. They’re my parents, my _real_ parents. I run to hug them. “Mum. Dad.” I whispered. 

“Clara,” they whispered, I never want to be separated from them ever again. We pull away, smiling, and I take my mother’s hand that grips it preciously. 

“So, Romana, Leela where do you want me to take you? Leela I can take you home but Romana…” He trailed off. 

“I’m going back to Gallifrey,” she said bluntly. 

“Sorry, what?” he asked, I noticed sadness cross his face, and Romana responded, “I’m the rightful Time Lord president, not Rassilon.” 

He nods sadly, “You’ll die, Romana.” 

“I don’t care. There’s nothing left for me otherwise.” 

“There’s me.” The two exchange a look for a moment, and Romana dismissed it. 

“I can’t, I’m sorry, Doctor. Those days are over,” he nods, sets the coordinates, and the TARDIS sets to Gallifrey. 

“Where are we headed?” I asked. 

“Gallifrey, five minutes before the timelock,” he said flatly. We land, Romana says her goodbyes to the Doctor, and then turns to me. 

“Well, it was nice knowing you, Romana.” I said after the awkward silence. 

She nods, “You too. Thanks for… comforting me.” 

I put on a smile, “Anytime.” 

She nods, and walks out the doors out onto the burning Gallifrey. The TARDIS starts to take off, but Leela screams, “no!” trying to get his hands off the controls. He pushes her away. 

“There’s nothing left for me, Doctor. What else do I do?”

 “You can go home,” he said pushing her hair behind her ear. 

“My husband… he’s dead.” 

I feel her pain, her sorrow, her love for him, and tears spring to my eyes. _It’s okay, Leela. I’ve lost a mother, and that hurt._ She turns to look at me, tears in her eyes, and she nods. She got the message, why do I have to be all so powerful? I see it all, no, Clara don’t think that. Don’t go in another episode. 

The TARDIS jerks, and we land somewhere. Leela says goodbye to the Doctor, leaves the TARDIS, and a shot is heard from outside. He sniffles a sob back, and then dematerializes. The TARDIS starts going wacko. I grab a rail, and try to pull myself up but I only find myself to fall down again. Dad lifted himself to look at the scanner, “We’ve fallen out of the vortex!” he confirmed, anger spilling into his voice, “Where _exactly_ are we going?” dad asked the Doctor in anger. 

“Spoilers!” we come to a crash, all of us falling to the floor. The lights go out, and we’re left in the dark. 

“What happened?!” I shouted. 

“The TARDIS is dead,” dad circled the console, “And we fell out of the vortex. Which means only one thing…” he trailed off, he stops looking at the Doctor. “You took us home.” 

“I want you lot safe, you don’t belong in my universe,” he confessed. 

“I was born in _your_ universe!” protested mum, now standing up. “So was my husband.” She takes his hand. I get onto my feet. 

“Yeah, but your family is here. Your friends are here. I’m not leaving you quite yet. We still have to sort Clara out. I have a question: How does Clara have the Bad Wolf in her mind?” the Doctor is looking straight at my parents now. 

“I don’t know,” confessed dad. “I thought… I mean you thought, that the Bad Wolf had gone but I suppose not. It must’ve passed through the genes when we had her.” 

“Can’t we go outside and discuss this?” I asked breaking the conversation up, and they all turn to look at me. "It’s rather dark in here.” Mum agrees, and comes over to take my hand. We walk out the doors, and into the fresh air. It’s home, the birds are tweeting happily.


	8. Leadworth

“It’s Leadworth,” said the Doctor gaping.

“You’ve been here?” asked mum.

“Alternate one. This is like in the dream. Looks like Upper Leadworth,” he said while looking around.

“How-?” Said dad.

“What dream?” I asked.

“Adventure with my former companions, we got stuck in a dream reality of their village,” he explained. “So! Show me around.”

“Well, that’s home, the middle house there,” mum told him indicating to the three houses in front of us. “The Owens’ live on the left, and the Williams on the right. But Doctor,” she turns around to face him, “Clara is more important right now.” 

“Yes, course she is,” he turns to look at me. “I need to look into your mind, Clara. It won’t hurt, I just need to see.” 

“Doctor…” I warned I don’t want him to see anything! His hands go on my head, and he enters my mind.

_I’m being born. Mum is rocking me in her arms; dad is sitting beside the bed._

_“Oh, I’ve waited to see this day,” he commented._

_Mum smiles at him, “What should we name her?”_

_“Your choice, Rose Tyler.”_

_“Clara,” she said, “Clara Rose Tyler.”_

_Dad smiles._

_I’m sitting on mum’s lap; she’s reading_ Goodnight Moon _by Margaret Wise Brown._

_“’In a great green room there was a telephone and a red balloon…’” mum read._

_My first book ever; I still have that same copy._

_I’m learning lots of new things so rather quickly. Then I’m standing next to mum in front of a blue door bouncing up and down. Mum knocks and a red haired woman, Amy answers._

_“Rose!”_

_“Hello, Amy,” she smiled._

_A small mini Amy comes beside her. “Melody, meet Clara.”_

_“Hi,” Melody waves._

_“Hi,” Clara waves._

_That’s when I became friends with the one and only Melody Williams. It’s my fifth birthday when I got Wolfie, I was so happy that day; my first day of school, being bullied by the other kids, and then being taken out as soon as my parents found out. My birthdays pass. My TARDIS cake, and hanging out with friends. My 13th birthday comes, I yell at my Mum. I start having a crush on Alfie; four years later I go on a date with him. I come home and find Wolfie dead, I’m devastated and I start to fall out of the world. I become Clara Oswald…._

The Doctor is in front of me with a jealous and shocked look on his face. I don’t know how those two mix but that’s what he has. “Wolfie, love of wolves. The Bad Wolf is what caused that. Cleverness, your dad, you’ve never fit in have you?” I shake my head sadly. “Oh, Clara. I’m sorry.” He gives me a hug, and I hug him back tightly. Never ever in my life has anyone known my feelings about life. After a minute or two when he lets go and I have tears in my eyes.

I wipe them dry, “I’m just so clever, I can see the whole of time and space whenever I close my eyes. That’s why I hated bedtime,” I look straight at my parents, their bodies tense, and mum grabs dad’s arm.

“Whenever? Even if you just blink?” the Doctor asked. I nod in reply. “That’d keep you good against the Weeping Angels, eh?” 

“I could make the Weeping Angels turn to dust,” I reminded.

“Well true,” a smile comes on my face. “A smile! There it is!” I look down to hide it. “That was a smile!" 

“No it wasn’t,” I lied. 

“It definitely was. Smiles are good, now Clara. How do we free Clara? Eh? Gotta free Clara of the Bad Wolf without…”

“What?”

“Never mind,” he said.

“What?!” I demanded.

He stares at me, “Where’d that come from? I’ve never seen that side of you.”

 “From dad’s side.”

 “Yeah, I reckon it would be. You sounded exactly like Donna,” he stands. “Can we go inside? It would a lot nicer if we could go inside.”

“The house is a mess,” mum complains. 

“Oh well. Doesn’t really matter, just gotta free Clara that’s all.”

“You don’t want to see it,” mum was looking at him now.

 “Rose. It doesn’t matter,” he looks into her eyes, their eyes catch. Their cheeks turn red and they quickly look away. Dad’s face is full of jealously as he turns away.

“So! Are we going inside or not?” I asked breaking the awkward moment.

“Not our house,” mum said.

“Well, where then?”

Just then a mane of long red hair comes on a bike right past me, she comes to a stop. “Clara! Don’t do that ever again!” Melody clambers off her bike letting it fall to the ground then hugs me.

“What’d I do?” I asked confused.

“You disappeared!”

“You weren’t there so how’d you know that?”

“The Doctor. Come on Clara let’s get inside. I’m not letting you out of my sight.” 

“The Doctor lies,” I said trying to cover up that I really did disappear.

“He sounded frantic, why would he be lying?” Melody grabs my hand. “Come on you lot,” she looked at my parents and the Doctor. We run to the house, we enter the front door into the large house.

“Clara!” exclaimed Rory coming from the stairs. “Don’t disappear like that!”

 "Sorry,” I apologized. “How long has it been?”

 “Two hours.”

“Better than a year, though eh?” I reminded him. Rory tilts his head back and forth before nodding. I chuckle, Rory smiles, and the Doctor comes to stand beside me.

“Whose house is this?” he asked. “It’s huge!” 

“This isn’t the most of it,” Rory replied.

The Doctor looks away to look at him, “Rory?”

“Yeah. Why’d you change?”

“Sorry, what?” He asked confused.

“Your suit is purple. Last I checked it was brown, it’s always been brown.” 

“Last I checked you never had a ponytail,” the Doctor said back when Rory turned his head. 

“I-“ he started before pausing, “I’ve always had a ponytail!” 

A slam of a door, and two heads of red hair come rushing past. The door opens again, “Amy! I was just- Amy!” A voice called but she had already gone upstairs. The alternate Doctor stood beside the stairs. “Amy, please! She came aboard and I didn’t know!” Amy didn’t call down, and the Doctor sighed. Rory looks from the alternate version to the other, “Um… what?” was all he said.

 “What?” the alternate one said looking up.

“There’s two of you,” Rory said.

 “Two of me?” he looks around and notices the purple suited Doctor. “Well brilliant! Future version or alternate? I reckon it’s alternate cause that’s what Clara was talking about earlier plus I’d never wear purple. Purple’s ugly.”

I look up at up at my Doctor, he looks offended. “Purple isn’t ugly! It’s cool. Purple’s cool,” I sigh exasperated. 

“Are you a alternate version of me? That’s what I want to know.”

“Yeah,” he replied and the brown suited Doctor grins.

“Nice to meet you, mate. I see you’ve got a bowtie,” he points at it.

“Bowties are cool,” my Doctor said fixing his bowtie.

“They are,” Amy’s Doctor said doing the same.

I roll my eyes. “Doctor!” I exclaimed and they both look at me. I tug at m y Doctor’s sleeve, “Doctor. I need this out of my head.”

“Right! Sorry. Come on, Clara,” he leads me into the other room down the hall, and into the kitchen.

“Why don’t we snack on something while we figure out what to do about the Bad Wolf?” asked mum.

 "Brilliant idea, Rose,” said the Doctor.

 “What should we eat?” asked dad pulling a chair out so mum could sit down.

“Fish custard!” I stare at him, gaping. So that’s why there was fish fingers and custard in the TARDIS fridge…

“Chicken mustard!” said Amy’s Doctor coming in the kitchen. I make a disgusted face, how does he like that stuff? Fish custard sounds better than chicken mustard.

“Chicken what?” asked my Doctor in disgust.

“Chicken mustard! Chicken nuggets and mustard,” explained Amy’s Doctor.

“That’s disgusting!” exclaimed my Doctor. 

“It’s yummy! I’ll warm up some chicken nuggets, you’ll like it I promise,” Amy’s Doctor starts getting the food out.

“No one but him has actually tried it,” I mutter to the Doctor beside me. “He even tried to get Amy to but she utterly refused.”

“Well. At least my Ponds like…liked my fish custard…” he trailed off.

 Pond… It was Amy that was his companion, an alternate Amelia Pond and Rory Williams. There has be a Rory at least, he recognized him in the entry room.

“So,” said mum, “how do we get the Bad Wolf out of Clara’s head without… you know, what you did to Donna,” she muttered the last part but I could hear her fine.

_“Donna. Oh, Donna Noble. I am so sorry. But we had the best of times,” the Doctor told Donna._

_“No,” Donna said standing there. She wouldn’t believe what he was saying she didn’t want to go!_

_“The best. Goodbye,” the Doctor put his hands on her head._

_“No, no, no. Please. Please. No. No,” she protested but it was too late. The Doctor took her memories of him away and she said one last ‘no!’ before passing out into his arms. That part of Donna Noble was gone._

I gasp, I’m at the Williams’ dinner table, and my parents are looking at me worried. I’m clutching my head, I look up at the Doctor, “You took her memories away All of the memories of you, are you going to do that to me?” Will you, Doctor? Please don’t. I’m scared, I really am.

 “No,” he replied, “I can’t. Your dad is practically me, it wouldn’t work out like that.”

I nod at him, understanding, “It hurts, Doctor. It really, really hurts. Please help me,” I begged before I go into another episode.

  _A man is standing in front of the Doctor, he was asking how long Amy and Rory had been gone._

_“Seven weeks. I got sidetracked, a lot.”_

_"What happened to the other people who travel with you?” asked the man._

_“Some left me.”_

_On the TARDIS, the Doctor was rambling on what to do next to Martha Jones._

_“I just can’t,” replied Martha. She really couldn’t do it anymore, not after what the Master did to her family._

" _Yeah,” he responded knowing that it would end like this._

_Martha went on about how she couldn’t, they said their goodbyes; Martha gave him her cell phone then left sighing before heading to her house._

_“Some got left behind,” The Doctor at the party said._

_The scene changes, Clara’s now watching Susan Foreman and David Campbell standing beside the TARDIS. She heard a voice from inside: “One day, I shall come back. Yes, I shall come back. Until then, there must be no regrets, no tears, no anxieties. Just go forward in all your beliefs, and prove to me that I am not mistaken in mine. Goodbye, Susan, goodbye, my dear.”_

_The TARDIS dematerialized; Susan dropped the key and walked off with her new boyfriend._

_“And some, not many but, some died.”_

_River Song was connecting herself to the hard drive while the Doctor was handcuffed to the pole a ways away._

_“This is not a joke. Stop this now. This is going to kill you! I'd have a chance, you don't have any,” he didn’t want her to die even if he had no clue who she was._

_“You wouldn't have a chance, and neither do I. I'm timing it for the end of the countdown. There'll be a blip in the command flow. That way it should improve our chances of a clean download,” River told him emotions flooding through her. This Doctor had no clue who she was. Everything in the last 24 hours was horrible; she’d lost her parents for the millionth time, kissed a Doctor who didn’t know who she was, and had her last date with the Doctor at the Singing Towers. She told him about their last time together, and connected the two cables together then everything was gone._

_The Doctor told Brian, “Not them. Not them, Brian. Never them,” and Brian nodded hoping it would come true. The Doctor didn’t want it to be true either he couldn’t lose anyone else._

_Amy Pond turned around to face the Doctor, her face shining in tears. “Raggedy man, goodbye!” she disappeared, and the Doctor couldn’t stop sobbing. She was gone; his Pond was gone, forever. He felt River lead him somewhere, he didn’t know where but he didn’t care, not one single bit._

I gasp, catching myself on the table. Someone touches me, “Clara? Clara please turn around.”

I look up at the voice, I look into his green eyes, “Doctor, please tell me. Is that what’ll happen to me? It’ll hurt? In some way?” he just stares. “Doctor!” I exclaimed.

“Clara, please. Just calm. I figured out a way, and it won’t hurt,” I glare at him. “I promise. Cross my hearts,” he crosses his hearts, and I nod.

“Just do it quickly,” I look over at my parents; mum is clutching dad’s arm. “Whatever happens,” I said, “I will always love you.” Every single inch of their face is covered in terror; I try and smile at them before turning to the Doctor. “I’m ready,” he puts his hands on my head, and I close my eyes. He enters my mind, and I see the whole of reality itself. It hurts, oh it hurts! Please make it stop!

“Don’t worry, Clara,” said a calm voice, “You’ll be fine, I’m locking it away, you’ll never be able to open it.” I come to an open door, scared wondering what to do. “Just walk through it, Clara and you’ll be free.” I listen to his words, and walk forward. Ten steps, and I’m finally out. The door slams behind me, and a lock is heard.


	9. Freedom

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter! I hope you have enjoyed this story.

A face comes into view: the Doctor’s face. I look around, I’m at a dinner table, and I have no clue what just happened. 

“Doctor?” I said. 

“Shh. You’re fine,” he kisses my forehead and stands up. I look over at my parents, everything is so still and quiet, why is it so quiet? I’ve never felt this before. 

“Everything’s quiet,” I said. The Doctor has a wary look on his face, as do mum and dad. 

“Is she fine, Doctor?” asked mum. “What did you do?” 

The Doctor leans down to whisper something in her ear but I can’t make out what he’s saying. Mum nods happily, and clutches dad’s arm in love. 

“What happened?” I asked. 

The Doctor looks at me, “Nothing, Clara. You’re absolutely fine.”

I nod, “Yeah. I feel odd though, a whole lot better though,” I added. The Doctor nods, and then there’s silence for a few minutes. The silence has never been like this before, there’s always something shouting at me, and I have no clue why. 

The Doctor clears his throat, “So, everything’s fine now. I should get going then,” he starts walking away. 

“Hang on, where are you going?” I asked standing up. 

“Back to my universe.” 

“Without a goodbye?” I fake pouted.

“Well, I suppose I could,” I smile and he walks over to me, getting down to my height, he speaks. “Clara Oswald, my Impossible Girl you were amazing, absolutely amazing. We had the best of times, didn’t we?” I nod happily, confused at the Oswald part but that doesn’t damage my spirits. He smiles, “Goodbye, Clara Rose Tyler,” he turns to leave but I call after him. 

“Doctor, wait!” he turns around to face me, “Yes?” 

“How do I pick up my old life if you just leave like this?” I wondered. 

“Well, isn’t there a boy next door?” he raises his eyebrows, heat rises to my cheeks. He nods, smiling, “Goodbye, Clara,” he kisses my forehead, turns to my parents and says goodbye.

 “Alfie,” I muttered and run out of the kitchen, out of the front door and to the Owens’ house next door. I knock on the green door; out of breath hoping Alfie will answers, the next second his handsome face appears in the doorway. “Alfie. I’m sorry about last year, I left you!” 

“No need to apologize, Clara. Your best friend died, I understand.” 

I nod, “I’m going to answer this again and actually do it.” 

“Do what?” he asked confused. 

“Go out with you,” I raise my eyebrows, smiling. 

A smile appears on his face, and he pulls me into a hug. As he hugs me I feel it, something I haven’t felt in years. That hole in my heart that’s been missing, it’s filed with love. Alfie’s love, I let go, and we both laugh. My hand slips into his, and we grasp for life, hoping never to let go. 

I turn, the Doctor is going in his TARDIS, but he turns to look at me. I put a smile on my face and wishing he would get the words that I’m thinking; thank you, Doctor, for everything. Now as you get in your little blue box back to your home universe, find a companion because I don’t want you to be alone. Never be alone, Doctor. He looks at me meaningfully and smiles, nodding. 

My breath leaves my chest, he seemed to have heard me, not sure how, but he got it. He gets in his blue box, and she starts to dematerialize. Alfie and I watch her dematerialize smiling as we all head for the future. Now, Doctor as you show your future companions the universe, do one thing for me: Run you clever boy, and remember me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, that's the end of this story. Thank you to all my readers who have stuck to the end. Feel free to give any feedback that could make this story better, or what you liked about it.
> 
> <3


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